It makes my husband not want to be around me.  It makes my son start to mimic my undesirable outbursts.  It makes me dislike myself.  Why I get this way is beyond me.  I refuse to acknowledge that word, I will not put that on myself.  Maybe it is wrong of me, but I will not some word take over my life.  I have been praying for deliverance from this, but where is it?  Why am I feeling this way after having been free from this feeling for many years?  Have I done something to bring this onslaught of emotion??  Our circumstances have changed drastically in the last year so maybe it has affected me more than I realized.  My son is starting to yell and scream and I know he is picking it up from me.  I hate that I make him do that.  I want that to stop, I want him to be nice and speak nicely.  I understand he will get frustrated, but I know that I am the reason he takes it to a completely different level.  God are you there?  I know I haven't been perfect and I have not been studying your word like I know I need to.  Please hear my plea for deliverance.  From this affliction and this horrible ugliness inside me.  I hate the devil and I dont want him anywhere near me or my family.  Jesus, I am calling out to you in the midnight hour because my soul is overwhelmed.  My loved ones curse me and those who have called me sister are nowhere to be found.  I need you God, you are the only one I can trust and the only one who can free me from my pain.  I cry tears of sadness every day, tears of misery every night.  Half the time I cant even tell why I cry.  Where does this pain and misery come from??  Not from you Lord.  I have been baptized in water and in the spirit...but where is the anointing when I need it? Protect me Jesus, be a fence all around me...my walls they are crumbling.  Holy Spirit fill me with your peace and comfort.  In whom else can I trust?  I need you Jesus, to come to my rescue...where else can I go?